The stacks of Widener Library are an especially exciting place, capable of sparking a wide range of bodily functions. When nature calls, answer it with book in hand. These books specifically.
Illegal Leisure by Howard J. Parker, Row 66
Don’t worry, bathroom reading is the most legal leisure of all.
Piss Off! by Laura L. Finley and Peter S. Finley, Row 66
It’s actually about “how drug testing and other privacy violations are alienating America’s youth.”
(the library’s most sexist place because there is only a men’s bathroom)
From Here to There and Back Again by Sue Hubbell, Row West 50
Hubbell is a renowned author, best known, of course, for sharing a last name with a space telescope. Her book is a collection that seems to be aptly named for the cyclical nature of the body’s relationship with the bathroom.
THE SECOND FLOOR
Two Rivers by Naomi Williams, Row East 46
While your body makes use of its two rivers in the bathroom, this book does so in its title.
Although I have no idea what the rest of the book is about. From page 156, “Mixed with the freshness of greenery was the pungency of wine-soaked fruitcake.”
The Annals of Iowa, Volumes 1-73, Row West 34
Did you read anals? I did.
THE FOURTH FLOOR
(there is no bathroom on the third floor)
Curating Human Remains by Myra Giesen, Row West 40
From page 90: “The storage of collections to ensure their long-term survival is the priority of any institution.” Don’t flush.
In the Bunker with Hitler by Bernd Freytag von Loringhoven with François d’Alançon, Row East 40
Also a great bath read.
THE FIFTH FLOOR
Waterloo Companion by Mark Adkin, Row East 39
We call it the water-bathroom in this country.
The Lady and the Monk by Pico Iyer, Row West 43
Everybody poops. Even the Monk ladies.